You'll ruin your appetite...

As a kid I remember barreling into the house after playing long and hard, and feeling as if I might not make it because I was so hungry. "I'm starving!" I'd announce, with some dramatic flair. Mom was in the kitchen making supper, and I'd whisk past her to the drawer that held cookies, and sometimes candy. Without even looking up from the potatoes she was peeling, mom would say, "Do NOT eat those. You'll ruin your appetite."

"Mom, I thought that was the point! I am hungry and I want to ruin that feeling." For years I thought she was simply saying she didn't want her hard work of making supper going for naught. Of course, what she really meant (in addition to that) is eating sugary treats gives you a false sense of being full. The sugar high doesn't really last, but if eaten right before a meal you won't want the real nutrients your body needs. Apparently man does not live by Snickers alone.

I often wonder why I don't have a stronger hunger for God like I read in Scripture: "As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God." (Psalm 42:1-2) "Whom have I in heaven but You? And on earth, there is nothing I desire besides You." (Psalm 73:25) I confess that's not the way I always want or desire God.

It can seem that hunger for God is as fickle as the weather. It comes and goes in various degrees of intensity, but what you do doesn't affect the patterns. We have weather forecasters, but not weather formers. Yet if my physical hunger is directly impacted by certain actions, then there could be important spiritual parallels.

Perhaps, when I don't desire God like I should, it's because I have been ruining my spiritual appetite with all manner of spiritual junk food. Maybe not even "junk" food, but stuff that really isn't intended to be the main dish. If I constantly run to them when I feel the first hunger pangs for peace, or joy, or love in my life, I will ruin my appetite for the main dish of God's life truly filling me.

Jesus teaches us that "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they will be filled. " (Matthew 5:6) Maybe the blessing begins when we allow ourselves to really feel hungry instead of rushing to ruin our appetite with anything or anyone that will take the edge off that sensation of need. Ultimately I listened to my mother because I knew she really was preparing a meal that would satisfy me. Hunger is a blessing if you know the One who can fill and satisfy you, and that He will.

I pray we can all stay hungry and thirsty, and practice the spiritual exercise of delaying instant gratification for the very best that God has for us.

Remember the day when you came out of the land of Egypt

Deuteronomy 16 gives instructions for the Israelites to celebrate the Passover meal each year. The purpose of this unique and special meal is made explicit: "that all the days of your life you may remember the day when you came out of the land of Egypt." (Deuteronomy 16:3) We wonder how they could ever forget the day they were set free from their brutal captors, from the despair of total slavery? But human beings are fickle creatures, and God knows our inclination to forget the things that are most important as we go about the routines of living. So God instituted the Passover meal.


On the night he was betrayed and  arrested, Jesus celebrated the Passover with his disciples, but he changed a few things. He redefined the Passover around himself: "This is my body...this is my blood." We were slaves to sin, but Jesus' death freed us from that bondage. And whenever we eat the bread and drink the cup we are to "remember the day when we came out."


Do you remember the day when you realized how God through Christ freed you? I know some people struggle to think of a particular day or definitive moment when they put their trust in Jesus. It may have happened slowly over time, until one day you realized that you were following Jesus because you wanted to, not because it was the tradition of your parents or family. Instead of a light switch flipping on, it felt like more of a dimmer switch progressively lighting the room. Even if you can't identify one "day" to remember, it's important to know that you are, in fact, following Jesus because you know what it means to be enslaved to sin...you know there is an "Egypt" and you are glad, by Jesus' undeserved saving actions on your behalf, to be given freedom.


I suspect that the second generation of Israelites following the commands of Deuteronomy 16 may have felt the same way. How can we remember the day we left Egypt? We weren't even born when it happened! But at the Passover, they did remember. They remembered by hearing the true story of what God had done for their people (and was still doing for them!), and how this was also their personal story. They felt the pain and suffering of slavery through the lives of others, and they realized how blessed they were to be free.


Remembering forces us to think, "Is this my story, or just someone else's story?" If you believe it's your story, the remembering begins to build and grow a profound gratefulness for what God has done...the momentum of love in your life: "We love because He first loved us." (1 John 4:19) If you don't believe it's YOUR story, if you think you are free from the "Egypt" of sin because of your own strength or power, or maybe because there really isn't an Egypt at all, then taking communion (the re-defined Passover) won't have much of an impact on you, no matter how often you take it.


Let's celebrate God's love and grace "that all the days of your life you may remember the day when you came out of the land of Egypt." (Deuteronomy 16:3)

How God guides us

This Sunday I'll be preaching on "Our plans and God's will" from Ruth chapter 3. In my preparation, I came across a classic text from J.I. Packer, who mentions five ways God guides us in decision-making, and what we must be willing to do to know God's will. I won't be able to cover all of these on Sunday, so I hope you are encouraged to read them here...

"If we want God to guide us, our attitude needs to be right. Here are some guidelines as to how we can play our part in arriving at right decisions:

First, we must be willing to think. It is false piety, super-supernaturalism of an unhealthy pernicious sort that demands inward impressions with no rational base, and declines to heed the constant biblical summons to consider. God made us thinking beings, and he guides our minds as we think things out in his presence.

Second, we must be willing to think ahead and weigh the long-term consequences of alternative courses of action. Often we can only see what is wise and right, and what is foolish and wrong, as we dwell on the long-term issues.

Third, we must be willing to take advice. It is a sign of conceit and immaturity to dispense with taking advice in major decisions. There are always people who know the Bible, human nature, and our own gifts and limitations better than we do, and even if we cannot finally accept their advice, nothing but good will come to us from carefully weighing what they say.

Fourth, we must be willing to be ruthlessly honest with ourselves. We must suspect ourselves: ask ourselves why we feel a particular course of action will be right and make ourselves give reasons.

Fifth, we must be willing to wait. "Wait on the Lord" is a constant refrain in the Psalms and it is a necessary word, for the Lord often keeps us waiting. When in doubt, do nothing, but continue to wait on God."

James Packer, Your Father Loves You, Harold Shaw Publishers, 1986, Page 13.

More than we asked for

Three of the four gospels give us the account of Jesus meeting Jairus and an unnamed woman suffering from a mysterious bleeding disease (Matthew 9:18-26; Mark 5:21-43; and Luke 8:40-56). Jairus is a synagogue ruler with a 12 year old daughter who is very sick and near death. He comes to Jesus with one request: "My little daughter is dying. Please come and put your hands on her so that she will be healed and live." (Mark 5:23) Time is of the essence. Jesus is going to have to act quickly if Jairus is going to receive the one thing he wants--sparing his daughter from death, and himself from the grief and fear of losing his precious child.


While Jesus is on the way to help the little girl he is thronged by large crowds of people. In this chaotic mass of humanity is a woman who also has one desire, though she feels she can get it from Jesus without actually asking for it. While Jairus has been enjoying the life of his daughter for the last 12 years, this woman has been in misery. She has gone to doctor after doctor, spending all she had to find healing for persistent bleeding. In that Jewish culture her problem was more than physical. Bleeding (especially if it had to do with her regular cycle as a woman) made her ceremonially "unclean" and unable to participate with the community in worship and fellowship. Her uncleanness would make others ceremonially unclean if she touched them. 12 years of having people avoid you could not have been easy. If she remained silent about her condition and interacted with others, she risked their anger if they found out afterwards ("Now you've made ME unclean! Why didn't you stay away from me!?"). 12 years of this must have left quite the emotional and psychological wound. Yet, all she wants from Jesus is an anonymous physical healing. "If I just touch his clothes, I will be healed," she said to herself (Mark 5:28).


As the woman pushes through the crowd (creating the potential for an angry mob if they discover who she is), she gets what she wants. She touches the edge of Jesus' clothes and is instantly healed. "She felt in her body that she was freed from her suffering." (Mark 5:29) Jesus realizes instantly that healing power has gone out from him, but instead of hurrying on to deal with a dying girl, he stops and insists that the woman make herself known. Jesus doesn't do this to embarrass her. He wants to give her more than she asked for because Jesus knows she needs more than she asked for. Yes, she has her physical healing, but her emotional wounds are still bleeding. Jesus has her testify to the crowd in his presence, and then provides what is still lacking: "Go in peace and be free from your suffering." She only asked for physical healing, but Jesus gives her more than that.


All this delay with the woman proves costly to Jairus. Word comes that his little girl has now died. If only Jesus had not wasted time Jairus could have had the one thing he asked for. Yet Jesus is now going to give Jairus more than he asked for, not less. Jesus tells Jairus, "Don't be afraid; just believe." Jesus goes to see the now dead 12 year old, and, in the presence of Jairus and Jairus' wife, Jesus miraculously raises her from the dead. All Jairus had asked for was physical healing to avoid the fear of death. Instead, Jesus takes Jairus beyond death and back again to life. A physical healing would have been a temporary respite from fear of death. Jairus will have to face that fear in the future with the impending death of his spouse, a family member, a friend, or even his own death. Jairus is given a reason for faith in Jesus that overcomes death. “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” (John 11:25-26) Jairus could now answer, "Yes!" to this question.


It makes me wonder...I ask God for many things in my prayers. When I don't get what I want could it be that the Lord is in the process of giving me MORE than I asked for? Could it be that I don't really know what I really need? That God's love for me refuses to settle for less, and goes deeper to address my ultimate fears, wounds, and needs?


"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God." (Philippians 4:6) However, prepare yourself to get more than you ask for from the God who loves us and knows us better than we know ourselves. "Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen." (Ephesians 3:20-21)

Biblical Repentance

I regularly tell my congregation that we are "forgiven sinners" to remind us that we are in Jesus' Church by grace, not by self-righteous works. Everyone is a "lost sinner" at some point, but we become forgiven sinners when we give up trying to earn salvation, and by faith receive Jesus' righteousness for our unrighteousness.

However, that phrase is not meant to make us complacent about our sin. We must avoid the wrong motive that says, "Let's sin so that grace may abound--God will simply forgive me of anything, so it doesn't matter what I do!" So we, as forgiven sinners, must still feel the weight of our sin, confess it, and repent (turn away from it). And we must do this regularly, not as a matter of earning God's favor (I didn't earn it in the first place, and I can't earn it later on), but as a matter of gratitude and love, in response to God's undeserved and faithful love to us.

So how do I recognize when I am repenting in the truest Biblical sense? I came across this thoughtful list by Jared Wilson at The Gospel Coalition website:

12 SIGNS OF GENUINE REPENTANCE

1. We name our sin as sin and do not spin it or excuse it, and further, we demonstrate “godly sorrow,” which is to say, a grief chiefly about the sin itself, not just a grief about being caught or having to deal with the consequences of sin.

2. We actually confessed before we were caught or the circumstantial consequences of our sin caught up with us.

3. If found out, we confess immediately or very soon after and “come clean,” rather than having to have the full truth pulled from us. Real repentance is typically accompanied by transparency.

4. We have a willingness and eagerness to make amends. We will do whatever it takes to make things right and to demonstrate we have changed.

5. We are patient with those we’ve hurt or victimized, spending as much time as is required listening to them without jumping to defend ourselves.

6. We are patient with those we’ve hurt or victimized as they process their hurt, and we don’t pressure them or “guilt” them into forgiving us.

7. We are willing to confess our sin even in the face of serious consequences (including undergoing church discipline, having to go to jail, or having a spouse leave us).

8. We may grieve the consequences of our sin but we do not bristle under them or resent them. We understand that sometimes our sin causes great damage to others that is not healed in the short term (or perhaps ever).

9. If our sin involves addiction or a pattern of behavior, we do not neglect to seek help with a counselor, a solid twelve-step program, or even a rehabilitation center.

10. We don’t resent accountability, pastoral rebuke, or church discipline.

11. We seek our comfort in the grace of God in Jesus Christ, not simply in being free of the consequences of our sin.

12. We are humble and teachable.

As it is, I rejoice, not because you were grieved, but because you were grieved into repenting. For you felt a godly grief, so that you suffered no loss through us. For godly grief produces a repentance that leads to salvation without regret, whereas worldly grief produces death. For see what earnestness this godly grief has produced in you, but also what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what fear, what longing, what zeal, what punishment! At every point you have proved yourselves innocent in the matter.

– 2 Corinthians 7:9-11

The difference between Religion and the Gospel of Jesus Christ

Tim Keller has an excellent summary of the difference between religion and the Gospel of Jesus Christ in his book/curriculum, "Gospel in Life: Grace Changes Everything." This is a great way to remember that when we are called to repent, it's not just from obviously bad actions, but also from actions that often appear good, but are spoiled by our inner motivation of self-righteousness, pride, or fear. We can do all the right stuff for all the wrong reasons. Here's the list:

RELIGION: "I obey; therefore, I'm accepted by God."
GOSPEL: "I'm accepted by God; therefore, I obey."

RELIGION: Motivation is based on fear and insecurity.
GOSPEL: Motivation is based on grateful joy at being fully loved.

RELIGION: I obey God in order to get what I want from God.
GOSPEL: I obey God to get God--to delight in and resemble him--because God is all I ever wanted.

RELIGION: When circumstances in my life go wrong, I am angry at God or myself, since I believe that anyone who is good deserves a comfortable life.
GOSPEL: When circumstances in my life go wrong, I struggle, but I know all my punishment fell on Jesus and that while God may allow this for my training, he will exercise his Fatherly love within my trial.

RELIGION: When I am criticized, I am furious or devastated, because it is critical that I think of myself as a "good person." Threats to that self-image must be destroyed at all costs.
GOSPEL: When I am criticized, I struggle, but it is not essential for me to think of myself as a "good person." My identity is not built on my record or my performance, but on God's love and actions for me in Christ.

RELIGION: My prayer life consists largely of petition, and it only heats up when I am in a time of need. My main purpose in prayer is to control my circumstances and environment.
GOSPEL: My prayer life consists of generous stretches of praise and adoration. My main purpose is fellowship with God.

RELIGION: My self-view swings between two poles. If and when I am living up to my standards, I fell confident, but than I am prone to be proud and unsympathetic to failing people. If and when I am not living up to standards, I feel humble but not confident--I feel like a failure.
GOSPEL: My self-view is not based on my moral achievement. In Christ I am simultaneously sinful and lost, yet accepted in Christ. I am so bad that he had to die for me, and I am so loved that he was glad to die for me. This leads me to deep humility and confidence at the same time.

RELIGION: My identity and self-worth are based mainly on how hard I work, or how moral I am--and so I must look down on those I perceive as lazy or immoral.
GOSPEL: My identity and self-worth are centered on the one who died for me. I am saved by sheer grace, so I can't look down on those who believe or practice something different from me. Only by grace am I what I am.

Love Economics

I've been reading Tim Keller's book, "The Meaning of Marriage." It's excellent, not only for a Biblical understanding of marriage, but for any follower of Christ who wants to grow in loving our neighbors as ourselves. Here's a powerful excerpt on finding fulfillment and happiness on the other side of serving the needs and interests of others before our own:

"The gospel, brought home to your heart by the Spirit,  can make you happy enough to be humble, giving you an internal fullness that frees you to be generous with the other even when you are not getting the satisfaction you want out of the relationship. Without the help of the Spirit, without a continual refilling of your soul's tank with the glory and love of the Lord, such submission to the interests of the other is virtually impossible to accomplish for any length of time without becoming resentful. I call this 'love economics.' You can only afford to be generous if you actually have some money in the bank to give. In the same way, if your only source of love and meaning is your spouse, then anytime he or she fails you, it will not just cause grief but a psychological cataclysm. If, however, you know something of the work of the Spirit in your life, you have enough love 'in the bank' to be generous to your spouse even when you are not getting much affection or kindness at the moment...The deep happiness that marriage can bring, then, lies on the far side of sacrificial service in the power of the Spirit. That is, you only discover your own happiness after each of you has put the happiness of your spouse ahead of your own, in a sustained way, in response to what Jesus has done for you." (Tim Keller, "The Meaning of Marriage," pp. 57-58)

This is why I think 1 John 4:19 ("We love because He first loved us.") is not simply a chronological statement, but an ongoing reality of having our core, foundational need for love met by God, which then frees and empowers us to love others. Without experiencing God's first love each day, we inevitably fall back into the sinful mode of trying to use or manipulate people to get out of them what we want--which ultimately only God can provide. We cannot truly love others in a sustained way unless we have our need for love met first by God. This is true in marriage and in every other human relationship.